Comments on "An Unexpectedly Long Journey to Milwaukee"

This for the most part was a great story, however, if the following ideas are taken into consideration it could be better . . .

#1 Fluency -

While there are great ideas here it flows like a list of events instead of growing like a story. To help with the fluency maybe the application of more scenic details might be in order, or maybe a little more dramatization in some of the areas i.e., when the story talks about the drive to Milwaukee. Maybe if there's some dialogue going in that part it may add to the substance of the story.

#2 View Mode -

A few times during the story the 1st person or 3rd person view mode gets confused. If the story is meant to accomodate both view modes then the transitions need some attention, but if it's only meant to be one view mode then a simple proofread will fix the errors.

Overall this is a sound rough draft, but everything has the potential to be better. Hope this helps

CreAtIVe SpiLl

Well this story has actually thrown me for a loop because I have no idea what it should be about. It's a challenge because I don't want to get to involved and then make it extremely long and I don't want to make some thing that just stops. Whatever it is I'd like it to include some dialogue and possibly a love story or a murder mystery. Both of those seem so involved so I really dont know . . .

TeRm FroM ReSeArcH

My chosen term is: The Ladder Effect

The ladder effect is an idea that describes black people from a socioeconomic perspective. It suggests that there are blacks that work hard to climb the ladder of success but are pulled down by their peers, and that there are those blacks who successfully elevate on that ladder but pull it up behind them. The concept is vital is to my paper because it correlates with the division tactics prescribed within the Willie Lynch Documents suggesting that division of the race was key. The documents outline a process aimed at dividing blacks by complexion and it is my postulation that remnants of that idea place certain black people in a more conduscive position to climb the ladder of success. Which in turn then creates the thought of associating success with whiteness and creating a separation among the race.

My Take on "The Numbing of the American Mind"

Personally I feel like it was a strong that piece that was very accurate in describing the mental state of the average American in today's society. We have been programmed to accentuate negativity and lack for marketing purposes, and as a result it has dehumanized our culture to a certain extent. To defend my position, I attribute the accentuation of negativity and lack to marketing purposes because we live in a dogmatic business world. Everything is driven by the universal lubricant, mucho dinero, the almight dollar, simply stated money, and because of that everything in our society is directly related to or the business of it. Therefore, as long as media introduces fear or terror to the public the more business profits monetarily on some level, hence the turning of the world.

WeLcOmE tO mY bLoG!!

Welcome to my blog, my name is Linelle Anderson and I'm a freshman at the University of Wisconsin Madison. I consider myself to be consumed with the desire to always be better, to never be content with dissatisfaction. I know my path and I'm stumbling along the way . . . making mistakes, falling down, but most importantly getting back up and refusing to accept defeat. I'm different, sometimes intrigued by normalcy and its benefits, but comfortable with the fact that I'm different and in search of all that being different holds for me. I'm not the realest but I'm searching for realness in hopes to be everything that God has destined for me to achieve.